Presumptuous

I dared too much
The audacity to claim spiritual maturity
I pleaded to perceive the truth
Open my eyes
to the nature of things
And with thundering purity
The rug has been pulled from under me
I sought to penetrate life's greatest mysteries
but discovered the biggest mystery has been myself all along
What the hell is going on?
The truth has brought nothing but nightmares
blurred and numb
The mirror reveals a monster and the more I examine
the more horrifying it gets
Existence may be the death of me,
for I don't know how much more my heart root can take
while appearances deceive everyone around me
A frustratingly alluring facade to the world
involuntarily created to survive
My own lies had become my truth
Was blind but now I see
So why am I still a wretch?