comparing illnesses

This is something people generally shouldn't do. Can you really say that cancer is worse than diabetes but not as bad as schizophrenia or whatever? Every illness has its downside and not-so-bad side and anyone with any illness suffers. Can you compare someone's suffering to anyone else's? Just because it looks one way from the outside doesn't mean it really is that way. Different people suffer in different ways, some are more sensitive than others too. And yet, for mental health professionals they can not follow this wisdom. Why? Because the system can only help so many people so they constantly have to judge and compare, who needs help more than others? Who needs the most treatment? Who is most in danger from their mental illness? I know it must be done, but at the same time I hate it. I can feel my mental health professionals comparing me all the time to others who are more 'severe', and that usually means someone with schizophrenia. If you say you are hearing voices and seeing things that aren't there, you get service immediately. But if you have a more muddled diagnosis, or still have a grip on reality they tell you to just bear with it. It's not fair. We shouldn't be judged by what diagnosis we have but by how much we are suffering. Someone with severe anxiety has as little functioning as someone with schizophrenia. They can't step out of the house. That means they need help just as much. But I guess it also depends on which hospital you go to around here. And that's also not fair. There's no one to tell you which hospital is better to go to so it's pretty much random how much service you will get, no matter how bad you're feeling. I feel gypped. The hospital near my old house is shit. I was certainly not the worst off mental health wise but I was still very severe. And yet, my psychologist would say things like, well at least you don't have schizophrenia. Uh hello, I'm suffering like crazy! I need more help and that's all you can say?! I'd rather have schizophrenia if that would make you take me more seriously. I mean, how much worse can you be when you try to kill yourself every 3 months, do self-harm very often and are constantly at risk of overdosing because of being addicted to so many drugs? I was in the ER at least 10 times in 4 years. And all I got offered was a psychologist once a week and a psychiatrist once every 2 months or so. Fuck the system and fuck the hospital I go to. I already felt like an outsider all my life, now I'm even an outsider in the mental health system.