back home

Well I'm back now from the crisis center and overall it was good there. I made some awesome new friends and the staff helped me alot in terms of finding more resources for me. They're pushing to have me fast-tracked into a psychiatric program at the hospital near my house which is nice since it's kinda hard to wait to see a psychiatrist for another 1.5 months. It was neat to be surrounded with people who have different problems and don't judge each other. We could openly talk about our issues and easily joke around at the same time. One guy suffered from anxiety attacks because of overbearing parents, another is a recovering alcoholic who overdosed, two were homeless, one had post-traumatic stress disorder from abuse and another was bipolar. We had a huge age range, varied backgrounds and some were on welfare and others were millionaires. It was so great to be in such a varied mix, get along and see people get better or at least less consumed by their problems.
I'm happy to be back home since it's more comfortable but at the same time it's kinda bleh. I'm not sure what to do with myself. At least today anyway. Maybe that's part of the reason I lived away for a week. It was good to get more resources and people help me in that sense at the center but I think I'm still about the same internally speaking. Not much change in my broken mind and I'm still confused about my episodes and what to do about them for now. But I know God is following up on me and won't drop my case.