And down

Those episodes I talked about previously have become more frequent and words do not properly describe what they are like. Let's just say it is excruciating, debilitating and shake any confidence I might have in my mental abilities. When I don't have them I can function relatively normally but I'm constantly anxious in the back of mind, fearing when an episode may get triggered again. I saw the doctor yesterday and he prescribed me a drug that indeed works but it also makes me tired and dizzy. It's like it slows down my mind and saps my energy so that I can't get as easily upset. Which makes me worry. I don't want to end up drugged out for the rest of my life, agonizing over whether I'm losing my mind and wishing God can make it stop!
I'm just really thankful that I've got such as awesome pastor to talk to every week, he helps me more than anyone else. He told me to read certain verses from the Bible that refer to our identity in Christ and to write what God is saying to me through them. I started doing that today and I think it's helping.

School is almost over already and it's getting harder to work on things. Luckily my art theory class is done with so now all I have to worry about are my painting and lithography classes. For painting I have to finish my 5'x6' painting and probably one more smaller painting and for lithography...I'm not exactly sure. I guess at least I must finish my four colour print of which I only have one colour done. I have to remember to rub in asphaltum/ink before I wash out the stone!