More thoughts from psych ward

I had another dream with my mom. I bought a coffee for myself at a Tim's and she yelled at me for doing that. Something about wasting money which makes no sense and I was mad at her back. She wouldn't let it go. Hopefully I'll get to smoke soon. I got my clothes back and took a shower. Odd graffiti in the bathroom: Dr. ----- + me = 187. I changed rooms last night. My crazy roommate stole my last cookie. Caught her in the act. So mad she went through my stuff. Yelled at her. Read an article in the newspaper that made me cry. About a woman who got cancer and how her daughter reacted. I'm scared I could get cancer and leave young children behind too. The sitter thing will end today probably too. Trying to get a pass for Friday which is my music night to commemorate my mom. But I might not be ready. Sigh, such conflicting desires. But I feel ok so far. I'm still fragile but much better. I don't have urges to hurt myself. Just passing thoughts. Like running into traffic or overdosing on meds.