a good friend

Thanks Lord for the perfect timing my friend had tonight by calling me just after I cried and told my dad about the stuff in my last post. He tried his best to reason with me and help me feel better but it was my good friend who was more successful at it. She talked about her own problems and asked me about different options for mine and wondered why I felt so bad about myself since I did well in life, with good grades and many long-term boyfriends. She asked, "What will it take for you to think of yourself more highly? Lots of praise or something?" And I thought about it, even if I was a super art/music genius I don't think I would ever be satisfied with myself. And I was never good at accepting compliments, I would brush them off in my mind with "oh their standards are just low." So what's the answer? God's love of course. If I could just firmly and truly feel God's love for me all the time, then there's no reason to feel bad about myself since the Creator of the universe values me no matter what and that's all that really matters. I don't know how it feels to be unconditionally loved by other humans so I have no comparison or expectations of God which is bad. So all I can do is trust and have faith that He will show me more and more how He loves me.
Wow, and now a youth leader from church just called me and reminded me I have a unique divine destiny and shouldn't compare myself with others. Awesome timing Lord. I may still have a drink later though...